Schools are a perfect reflection of society.

They mirror the dysfunction in families.  They mirror the dysfunction in Government, and in the the world.  Parents blame schools.  Teachers blame parents.  People blame government, government blames the people.   Bosses blame employees and employees blame the leadership.  And we WONDER why our children have become so irresponsible and disrespectful.  Children are not taking responsibility.  They are constantly pointing fingers at others or at the situation.  It’s never “their fault”, they have an excuse for everything, and nothing is ever good enough; they complain constantly.  Remind you of anyone??

What has happened, we cry,  to the “good old days”??  REALLY?  Is it really that difficult to figure out?

For one thing, the good old days were not so good - those days are what created TODAY’S dysfunction. That “goodness” is what has been passed on from our grandparents, to our parents, to us and now to our children:  The pain, the repression, the belief that we’re never good enough, strong enough, rich enough, smart enough, pretty enough.  They’ve passed on their inability to express emotions or at least the belief that we should not because it’s not appropriate; we hold them in to the point that all that’s left is hurt, which becomes anger, because strangely, anger is more acceptable to express than sorrow (caring! compassion!) and heaven forbid if we expose ourselves to the point of expressing our vulnerability….our love.

Our children are our mirrors.

They are a perfect reflection of our dysfunctional people, families and society.   Think of a school as one big family.  Let’s see…what are some of the problems in families today?

Parents both work.  We are not spending the quality time with our children.  We are too busy.  We worry about money, how big our house is, how nice our clothes are, how we compare to the neighbors,  how many friends we have, and how powerful and important our friends are.

Schools worry about exams.  How well will the kids do?  How will the students’ marks reflect on the school, the teachers and the administration?  Teachers fear the administration coming down on them if their students don’t perform.  Administrators fear the school board….

What if we stopped worrying so much about exams and grades and how well our children are performing and started worrying about our children, our future and whether or not there will even be a future?!

Separation and Divorce are rampant.  Parents are fighting each other.  Parents can’t seem to agree and get on the same page when it comes to how to raise the kids most effectively.  There is no consistency, so children do not know what to expect.  Parents insult and disrespect each other right in front of their kids….

Schools also lack consistency.  From one teacher to the next, children do not know what to expect.  In one classroom they get away with everything, while in another they get in trouble for so much as a whisper.  Teachers criticize other teachers and insult and embarrass kids in front of the whole class.

What if a whole school got on the same page and made consistent rules and consequences in every grade and every class?  What if the children always knew exactly what was expected of them and what the consequence would be every time?

What if the rule was RESPECT and RESPONSIBILITY - among staff and students - always and ALL ways?

What if school staff all started behaving as if every thought, word and action was heard, seen and copied by the children.  What if parents realized the same thing?

So what, really, is the purpose of schooling?

Is it really about learning reading, writing and arithmetic?  About filling our childrens’ heads with knowledge?  About how well students are able to perform on standardized tests?  Or is it about training our children for life;  For a lifetime of Happiness and Success?  To be future leaders?  To save our planet?   Do teachers even know what school is really about?  Here we have all these amazing and caring people, teachers,  spending more time with our children than we do, and sadly they are essentially putting up with daily abuse.  Many of the most loving and compassionate teachers quit because their hearts and bodies simply cannot handle the heartache.  While others, out of necessity,  become hardened drill sergeants, yelling, screaming and abusing our children…perpetuating the problem!

So what will it take to make a shift?

The world ending in 2012?  A little late then, don’t you think?  Some say that 2012 will BE the shift.  We’ll be just scared enough about the end of the world to start to worry about the really important things.  Perhaps that’s what it will take to stop worrying about exams and how well our children compete , about how we “look”, and more about who we are being, about stepping up, summoning our courage and worrying about who our children are becoming.

WE must stop blaming and start to realize that what we see our children becoming IS a perfect reflection of US!!

We must start to BECOME the person we wish our children to become.

As Ghandi stated : “Be the change you wish to see in the world.”  Be the change you wish to see in our children!!

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